Sunday, December 20, 2009

She Finally Passed...

Her driving test!

Yes, my Olivia is now a licensed driver.
It only took 3 times but she passed on Saturday.  
And now my real worrying begins.

There are so many accidents these days with teenagers.  
I think it's because once a teenager gets their driver's license they get a car and forget everything about being careful.  
They forget all their parents told them about being safe 
and just drive as if they're going to live forever.

Well, I'm about to become a very unpopular mom.  
But that's only because Olivia is my life and 
I couldn't handle anything happening to her.  

Now, don't worry.  I will let her drive.  
But I need to have her take it slowly at first.  
Or maybe,  I need to take it slowly at first!
 
I remember reading the following when I was just a teenager myself.  
It made a huge impact on my life.
And now that my daughter is going to drive in a car alone I need to share this with her.  Maybe we all need to share it with a teenage driver.    

The day I died was an ordinary school day.

How I wish I had taken the bus. But I was too cool for the bus. I remember how I wheedled the car out of Mom. "Special favor," I pleaded. "All the kids drive." When the 2:50 bell rang, I threw all my books in the locker. I was free until 8:40 tomorrow morning! I ran to the parking lot, excited at the thought of driving a car and being my own boss.......

It doesn’t matter how the accident happened. I was goofing off going too fast. Taking crazy chances. But I was enjoying my freedom and having fun. The last thing I remember, I was passing an old lady who seemed to be going awfully slowly. I heard the deafening crash and felt a terrible jolt. Glass and steel flew everywhere. My whole body seemed to be turning inside out. I heard myself scream.

Suddenly it was quiet. A police officer was standing over me. There was a doctor, and my body was mangled. I was saturated with blood. Pieces of jagged glass were sticking out all over. Strange that I couldn’t feel anything.

Hey, don’t pull that sheet over my head! I can’t be dead. I’m only 17. I’ve got a date tonight. I’m supposed to grow up and have a wonderful life. I haven’t even lived yet, I can’t be dead.

Later I was placed in a drawer. My folks had to identify me. Why did they have to see me like this? Why did my mother have to face the most terrible ordeal of her life? Why did Dad suddenly look like an old man? He told the man in charge, "Yes, that is my child."

The funeral was a weird experience. All my relatives and friends walked toward the casket. They passed by, one by one, and looked at me with the saddest eyes. Some of the boys were crying. A few of the girls touched my hand and sobbed as they walked away.

I wish someone could wake me up and get me out of this casket! My mom and dad are so broken up. My grandparents are so racked with grief that they can barely walk. My brothers and sisters stare ahead like zombies, and move like robots. No one can believe that this happened to me.

Please don’t bury me! I have lots of living to do! I want to run and jump again. I want to laugh and sing. Please don’t put me in the ground. I promise if you give me one more chance, I’ll be the most careful driver in the whole world!
Please, God, I’m only 17!

19 comments:

  1. Welcome to a new phase of parenting! You are right, it does increase the worrying! I think as our kids grow up and our concern for their safety intensifies, we learn more of what it must be like for God and his concern for us.

    I've read that story about the teen driver before and it always gets to me.

    wb

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  2. Thanks for sharing that, I'm gonna print it out for my son to read. My best friend from High school was killed at age 19 because the boy she was riding with was drunk and speeding. Congrats to your daughter for passing the test, it took my son three tries to pass it:)

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  3. I wish I could give you wonderful advice to calm all your fears. But all I can say is, we've all been in your shoes at one time and it isn't easy! And the truth is, we will always worry about our babies no matter how old they are.

    All I can say is, God heard from me so much during those years I was afraid He would tell me to shut up! ;-) Hang in there and be the unpopular mom!

    Nancy.

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  4. Pretty poignant. I hope it will help your daughter to understand why you are feeling so protective during this new phase. I can barely stand letting my daughter go off to Sunday school on her own--I will need your help when she turns 16 for sure!!

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  5. Hello. I found your blog this evening...gald to read about your DH staying until the 26th.

    Wishing you and your family a Merry Christmas and the best for the New Year.

    Sharon

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  6. Dear Lois~
    *hugs*

    May the Lord strengthen
    your daughter and equip
    her for the task at hand!

    Love~ Jen

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  7. so glad to get to visit your blog tonight... Blessings to you and yours....Merry Christmas and a New Year filled with many blessings.
    Teresa
    Grammy Girlfriend http://teresa-grammygirlfriend.blogspot.com/
    and
    http://grammyababychangeseverything.blogspot.com

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  8. Hi Lois,
    Congratulations to Olivia! I remember reading that story many years ago. Michael has been driving for 4 years now and I still worry every time he leaves the house. It's what we do as mothers. Michael gives me a quick call when he reaches his destination and it means the world to me. Just pray. It's our most powerful tool! Hugs, Loretta

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  9. Congratulations Olivia! Now take your Mom's advice. She's worried about you and loves you.

    Lois, she'll be just fine and that story is definitely something that will stick with her.

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  10. Hi

    Been there and done that 4 times!! It is a season of very mixed feelings for sure. The independence and step towards total adulthood is an exciting thing for you both..but the extra amount of worrying and concern just comes with the territory of handing them those car keys. The mom in you can't be denied. I remember my new favorite sound was the crunch of the tires as they pulled back safely in that driveway. But I told myself everytime that walked out that door that they were in the mighty hands of our God, and it really was the safest place to be. Your story was a good one, and she will remember that and everything else you've taught her I am very sure. ENJOY this times in her life, there is soo very much more to come...
    Hugs,

    Debbie

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  11. Thoose are some powerful words that need to be shared.

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  12. I read that so, so long ago, in Ann Landers' column, I think it was...and have thought of it many times since -- so glad you found a copy and posted it anew, because it could end up saving many lives...we just had two teens die here, racing on a residential street...so very foolish and so very sad...

    But congrats to Olivia, those driving tests are nervewracking!!!

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  13. That is so chilling! I know your concerns. Been there twice.
    She will do fine, I'm sure. Just keep her in your prayers, always!
    Congrats, Olivia!

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  14. Hi Sunshine,
    I have read that pc. before and is a good thing to have her read. As a Mom who has gone thru this twice my advice is don't let her drive with anyone else in the car for awhile. It is usually when they have a pile of kids in the car that they show off. If she is a very responsible girl already then she will probably be a cautious driver. Also these days with the cell ph and texting you probably need to put down a hard and fast rule about that too! Cause that is becoming one of the biggest reasons for accidents these days
    and then pray pray pray. As soon as mine left the house I had to go pray to have any peace! And also tell her to never ever get into a car with someone who is drinking
    and at the wheel. I lost a friend and neighbor who was like a brother almost, like that. He didn't drink himself but he got in the car with someone else that was drinking!!
    Will pray for you hon!
    I am sure Olivia will be fine, but
    a few rules are defintitely apprepo.
    Blessings and Merry Christmas!!
    Nellie
    Oh Yea, Congratulations to Olivia,
    I am sure she is thrilled!

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  15. I remember how hard it was for me when our oldest son got his driver's license. I would cringe every time he pulled out of the drive way. It does get easier with time. Thank you for sharing the story. I wanted to pop over to wish you and your family a very Merry Christmas and Happy New Year. A special thanks to your hubby for serving our country. I am sending tons of blessings your way for a wonderful New Year and always.

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  16. Congrats to Olivia - and good job..being the unpopular mom! :) Quite a story/poem..

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  17. Congrats to Olivia - and good job..being the unpopular mom! :) Quite a story/poem..

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  18. I remember this reading. In fact my best friend performed it in one of our Speech Contest.

    I will pray a prayer for Olivia and you. My Hannah is 17 and still has not taken hers. She is not the best driver and we have been working on it. We live in the country on a dangerous highway. An 18 year girl was killed on our highway right before we finished building our house here about 2 years ago. However~ Dad is home on Christmas break and is pushing our Sr. to get moving in life. He is making her take her test next Wednesday. I am praying she passes but like you I am going to be careful. She will be going to College next year and needs to be able to drive. I have been running her back and forth to work at TJ MAXX for 2 years. My oldest daughter was so different . She had hers the day she turned 16~so independent. Anyway~ I share your concerns. I am excited for Olivia ~I know it is such a right of passage!
    You have a very Merry Christmas~Friend!

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  19. Lois, I'm a bit behind in my blog reading, but will catch up eventually. Been thinking about your family and praying for you all.

    I thought I would die on the spot the day I stood at the window and watched, for the first time, my two sons leave the driveway together. The 16 yr old was driving and the 12 year old his passenger. I truly think this is one of the hardest things a parent has to go through in the "letting go" process of raising our kids to be independent. God places in the heart of a mother that strong protective instinct and then asks us to gradually lossen our grip.

    The good that comes from it is that it will drive you to your knees and get you to again and again throw yourself at the feet of Jesus, who loves your children even more than you do, even though we cannot comprehend that.

    Well you have joined the club, dear mom. One of the funniest things we talk about now is when our younger son started driving and dating (at about the same time). The phone rang when he was out late one night, and my husband answered. On the other end of the line was our son saying, "dad, where AM I?" Turns out he knew only one route to his (then girlfriend's, now wife's) house and a big firetruck was blocking an intersection so he had to detour. I got on the phone and started yelling at him for talking on the cell while driving and told him to pull off the road. Then I remembered it was a bad neighborhood, and started yelling for him NOT to pull off the road!

    Oh my...you sure have a lot of stuff going on in your life don't you? Here's a big hug! :)

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